The craziest things happen at Target.

Let me see if I can make a long story short.  (I don't know if I am capable of that)  Anyway... We go to Target (#1) and I fall in love with a lamp that is on sale.  Compared to the $50 lamps that I have been falling in love with this one has a perfect price tag.  Ringing in at about $8 bucks... I needed it.  The only problem was that there was only one of it's kind at this Target and I need 2.  Of course there was a similar one but it was square and I wanted the round one.  We put the round one in the cart and head for the checkout counter where Lincoln decides to start yelling

"I POOP IN MY PANTS!  MOM... I POOP IN MY PANTS!"

 and starts walking like he is bow legged.  Everyone is starting to stare. FML Seriously!?!  NOW???  Okay so I grab him and take him to the bathroom while Taylor checks out and I meet him at the car.  Time to go to Target (#2) because I am sure that they will have a match for my round lamp and I will be very happy to get 2 perfect lamps for my side tables that so badly need some decoration.  We get there... Target (#2) and realize that they do not have a round match to my perfect lamp but they do have a square one just like at the last Target we were at minutes before.  For the price... I say forget the round one that has no mate. I will buy the square one and go back to Target (#1) and buy the matching square one I decided wasn't good enough but it now makes the cut since it's my only option. We buy the square one. Only now I really, really want it's match.  I must go back to Target (#1) NOW before someone else gets it.  I must make my husband & tired, hungry and poopy pants children go back to Target (#1) and return the round lamp and purchase the square one so I will have a set of 2.  At this point I have in my possession 2 clearance Target lamps that do me no good because they are not the same.  As we pull into the parking lot (right next to where we were parked not 30 minutes before.  I search for my wallet (since I know Target will need my ID to make an exchange)  I can't find it.  I try to think about where I put it when I realize I never unloaded the cart.  My husband did.  I was dealing with Poop Pants Lincoln and I met him in the parking lot.  He was ready to go with the car running when I headed out to the parking lot.  My wallet is not in my purse and it is not in the car and then I look up... across the parking lot and tucked into a cart folded up into the part a baby would sit in... is my Volcom wallet.  My poor wallet was sitting all alone for about 45 minutes in a dark parking lot and I ended up finding it by accident...
me-"I think that is my wallet!"
"WHERE?" says Taylor impatiently. 
me-"RIGHT THERE!  Across the parking lot!  In that cart!"
 I run and grab it.  For the first time I am happy that Taylor was lazy and didn't return the cart to the "Put the carts back here or you won't go to heaven" section.  We exchange "Did that really just happen" glances.  I grab the round lamp to return and leave it at the customer service desk while I jog into the store to find the square lamp.  IT'S GONE.  I look all over.  I am starting to panic.  I call Taylor.
me- "DID YOU MOVE THE LAMP?"
Taylor- "Why would I... no... I didn't touch the stupid lamp.  I never even picked the thing up!" 
me-"YOU LIE!  YOU MOVED IT.  I Can't find it anywhere."
 and then I see my square lamp.  It is being held by a beautiful, big busted blonde in a dress and heels.  You have GOT to be kidding me.  I whisper into the phone "I see my lamp and there is a lady holding it."  I hang up without saying goodbye.  I follow her down an aisle.  I follow her down another aisle.  I am praying she decides that a square lamp that was 39.99 now marked down to $8 bucks is a rip off and that she sets it down somewhere... anywhere.  But I think she realizes I am following her.  So when she turns around to give me a "stop following me you crazy stalker look" I ask "Are you going to buy that?" and she holds up the lamp "This? Oh yes."  I have decided I hate this woman.  "Are you sure you want THAT lamp because I just drove from another Target for THAT lamp and I... " She interrupts me "Yes. I am going to buy it."  Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.  Whatever... I walk away.  I should have grabbed it and ran but I didn't.  I walk up to the service desk and grab my stupid round lamp that has no match walk to the car and toss it in the back with the other stupid square lamp that has no match.  I tell my car full of annoyed boys.  "Put your seatbelts on.  WE ARE GOING TO ANOTHER TARGET."  My husband says "No way" and makes me take him home.  Fine.  I am however NOT giving up.  I drop the husband off at home and head to Target (#3) with all my kids in tow and guess what... They have the round lamp that I originally wanted.  So now I have 2 perfect round lamps and one square one.  All that I can hope is that the perfect, blond lady wanted a mate for her lamp and tough luck.  It's in my trunk.  :P

Here is what I learned from this... If I had gotten what I wanted at that second Target I would have lost my wallet.  I didn't get what I had hoped for and therefore I had to go back to where I had left it.  I was upset I had to go back but what a bummer if I had lost it.  I would have never realized that my husband had accidentally left it behind in the cart.  Also... If that lady hadn't "stolen" my lamp.  I never would have ended up at Target (#3) and found the lamps I wanted in the first place.  So it wasn't a fun trip and it took waaaaaaaaaaay longer than it should have but it all worked out.  Moral of this lame story?  There will always be obstacles large and small.  They come in the form of blonde lamp thieves, kids who crap their pants and lost wallets.  It all worked out.  I guess everything does happen for a reason.